Hold your applause, please

Med four, you’re available at Local Hospital?”

Ten-four. My partner is walking out now, we’re ten-eight.”

Ten-four. Copy a 911 at Local ER. Female patient, white t-shirt, blue jeans, leaving the hospital now, wants to go somewhere else.”

…oh…kay…”

Med four, EMS Captain is clear, switch to talkaround.”

Ten-four…Four on Talkaround.”

Hey, guys. I’m clear on the call, I’ll head up there if you need me.”

Okay then. I’m not sure if we will need you yet. Shaq just got back in the truck.”

I’m clear. Just be advised, we can’t transport any patient from the ER from a 911 call.”
“Come again?”

If a patient calls 911 from the hospital, they have to be evaluated at that hospital, then the hospital has to arrange for a transfer if needed. We can’t take a 911 patient off of their property. The patient will have to leave the property before we can transport”

Okay, we’re clear.”

 

“Hey, buddy. You want some of these Oreos? They had them in the EMS room — what the hell is this on the MDT?”

“We got a call.”

“How did we get a call? We just went in service?”

“The call is here. Some gal is going to be walking out of the hospital. Wants us to take her to another hospital apparently.”

“Oh, so this has BLS written all over it, and you want me to handle it?”

“You’re the professional one, Shaq. Now how about them Oreos? Did you get me any milk?”

“Boy, I swear, I’m about to smack you upside your head. That must be her right there” he says, pointing to a woman meeting the description.

“Yeah, let’s go check it out.”

My mouth is full of the aforementioned Oreos as we watch a young, marginally attractive woman shuffle out of the ER front entrance, and shuffle her way over to a bench. We walk over to meet her.

“Hi, ma’am. I’m Shaq, and this is my partner C. Are we here for you?”

“Yeah. Y’all need to take me out of here to another hospital.”

“Well, what’s going on?”

“They are just rude in there, and they won’t take care of me. Take me somewhere else.”

“What brought you into the hospital this morning?”

“Well, me and my boyfriend was having sex, then after, I started hurting and burning.”

“Okay, What did they tell you inside?”

“I’ve been here for like, four hours and they try to tell me that I have gonorrhea or some shit like that. I ain’t got no gonorrhea. Me and my boyfriend are clean!”

“Well, did they do a pelvic exam and take a swab?”

“Yeah, the doctor did all that, then he tried to give me antibiotics, but I’m telling you, I ain’t got no gonorrhea.”

“Well, they are doctors, and those antibiotics are really important for you and your boyfriend to take.”

I ain’t got no disease. Take me somewhere else!”

“Well, I’m terribly sorry, but we can’t take you anywhere else.”

“You have to! I called 911.”

“I understand, but since you are at the hospital, you have to be evaluated and treated here, then the hospital has to have you transferred to another hospital.”

“That’s bullshit. You aren’t going to take me anywhere else?”

“No, ma’am. We spoke with our supervisor, and he says that we can’t.”

“Well what the hell am I supposed to do?!”

“It seems like you have several options. You can go back inside, and get those prescriptions filled. You can call someone to pick you up and either take you home or take you to another hospital, or you can leave the hospital property and call 911 again.”

“I can’t believe this. Y’all are going to make me leave and won’t take me to a hospital!”

“We are happy to take you to a hospital, but we can’t pick you up from this one. You’ll have to leave the property.”

“Fine then, I’m leaving.” she says, after which she gets up and starts shuffling off, down the sidewalk.

I’m still enjoying my Oreos, when Shaq turns to me.

“Let’s get in the truck. It’s gonna take her at least ten minutes to make it to that Citgo. We can probably be at the next post before she calls back.”

Med four.”

Med four.”

Ten-eight again. She’s gonna call back once she leaves the property.”

Ten-four. I’ll show you guys in the area standing by. I’ll let you know when she calls back.”

Shit.

Comments

  1. Flash Larry says:

    Nice to have management support. For once.

    We wouldn’t get that. At all.

  2. Never underestimate the power dispatch has on changing your best laid plans.

  3. Can't say, clowns will eat me says:

    Just remember as Twain said, never to argue with a fool. I think the same holds true for dispatch. You can’t reason with an idiot.

  4. So you just took her back to the same place right? Closest appropriate facility

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